Rio Ferdinand has waded into the John Terry race row by condoning calling Terry’s Chelsea teammate Ashley Cole a ‘choc ice’. Ferdinand denied that the term was in any way racial, saying in a series of entirely made up quotes, “I often call people by food names. I have a poor memory and it helps me remember who they are. I once forgot to do a, err, you know and I was banned from, err, I mean, I think I was, for a few months, or something. It was a long time ago.
“Anyway, I often call Anton ‘cabbage’ because his brain doesn’t appear to be attached to the rest of his body, and I call Giggsy ‘tart’ for obvious reasons. Sir Alex is ‘beetroot’ because of his face, but I do get confused and call him ‘radish’ sometimes if only his nose is red. I use names of sweets as well: Ashley Young is ‘lolly’ because he always says ‘Sucker!’ to refs when they award him a penalty.
“I know I used to call Graeme Le Saux ‘fruit salad’, but I can’t remember why.
“So when I agreed that Cole was a choc ice I meant he’s quite a cold person and tries to look hard on the outside, though he isn’t really.
Can I go now? I’ve got to pick up ‘potato’ from his gran’s house on the way to training.”
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